An excerpt from The Manipulated Man
Sex – as a Reward
Esther Vilar (née Katzen)
Every method of manipulation is based on the carrot and stick system and the degree of use of either depends to a large extent on the physical strength ratio between trainer and trainee. Even when dealing with young children there tends to be a preference for control by means of the carrot. This has the advantage of maintaining children’s trust in adults so that even at a later date they will still bring their problems to their parents – and so the process of manipulation is continued. This is much more effective than to start with the stick.
If a captive dolphin has learnt to do a trick well his trainer throws him a fish. Because the dolphin wants to eat, it will do whatever is asked of him. Man, however, since he earns money, is quite capable of providing his own food. It would be impossible to bribe him in this way. He would, in fact, be above bribery altogether were it not for one basic male need which has to be satisfied: the need for physical contact with a woman’s body. This need is so strong, and its fulfilment gives man such intense pleasure that one is tempted to feel it is probably the prime reason for his voluntary enslavement to woman. His longing for subjection may even be but a facet of his sexual make-up.
The basis of any economy is a system of barter. Therefore, someone demanding a service must be able to offer something of equal value in exchange for it. But as a man must fulfil his sexual desires and, since he tends to want to hold exclusive rights over one vagina, the prices have risen to an extortionate level. This has made it possible for women to follow a system of exploitation which puts even the most capitalist of systems into the shade. And no man remains exempt. The concept of femininity is essentially sociological and hardly biological. Even a homosexual is unlikely to escape without paying his dues. The partner whose sexual drive is less developed quickly discovers the weak points of the other whose drive is more intense, and manipulates him accordingly. It will always be the woman or the ‘female’ partner in any homosexual relationship who exploits the man; for to be a female means to be undersexed.
Just as woman denies herself any depth of emotion she denies herself a sexual appetite: how else could a young girl tell her boy-friend she loves him, but refuse him her body? Thanks to her mother’s advice, a girl will suppress her desires even in puberty for the sake of the capital to be gained later. In former societies a bride had to be a virgin to be worth anything and even today a girl who has had less experience of sex will have a higher credit rating than one who has had many lovers.
Chastity in a man, on the other hand, has never had much value. As women do not really care for him, they are, of course, not interested in his chastity. For this very reason a boy can never be raped by an older woman – only seduced. But let a man play that game with an adolescent girl! He will be hounded to prison as a sex criminal by a female mob.
Men could, of course, condition their sexual needs as easily as women, but their training would need to start at a very early age. Monks are a sufficient proof of this. After all, the majority of them survive without sexual satisfaction – and no one is seriously going to maintain that such a large group of men are all castrati. But instead of learning to suppress their needs, men allow them to be encouraged whenever possible – for the most part by women, of course. Their interests are mainly directed towards man’s libido.
Man is never dressed in such a way as to awake sexual desire in the opposite sex, but it is very much to the contrary with woman. By the age of twelve she is already dolled up as bait. The curves of breast and hip are exaggerated by tight-fitting clothes, and the length of leg, the shape of calf and ankle are enhanced by transparent stockings. Her lips and eyes beckon, moist with make-up, her hair with gleaming tints. And to what purpose, if not to stimulate the male to ever-increasing, everlasting sexual desire? She will offer her wares like goods in a shop window – apparently so near and, at a price, so easily obtained. No wonder men think there is no greater happiness than to make enough money to pay for such tempting merchandise.
If a man has no money, or, at any rate, no prospect of it, he will have to do without a woman – and consequently, without sex. Nevertheless, in the relationship between the sexes there is a certain credit system. In special circumstances – if the man is still being trained for his future profession, for example – a woman may be prepared to earn her own money and still allow him the use of her body. But this is only an advance against future returns. In such cases the interest rates will be proportionately higher: the future job for which the man is studying must promise an income high enough to make her investment worth while. As a general rule one can take it that the better endowed a woman is with sexual attractions, the more expensive the total cost will prove to be in the end. So, if a man thinks someone else’s wife more attractive than his own, there is no need to feel depressed. He should remember how expensive she is likely to be.
It would be far more economical for a man to satisfy his sexual needs with a prostitute instead of rushing into marriage; ‘prostitute’ in the conventional sense of the word, that is, since the majority of women belong by nature to this group. But his training intervenes yet again. As a result of his early conditioning as a member of a competitive society, he feels cheap sex has no real value. The greater the cost of the woman, the more sexual pleasure he will feel. And if he cannot get the woman he wants at any other rate, he will offer the highest price going. He will take her to the Register Office.
The Manipulated Man (Der Dressierte Mann), Esther Vilar, 1971. This from the Abelard-Schuman edition, London, 1972, pp. 69-72. See the Contemporary Heretic’s extensive review of the book here.